My dog ate my homework

It's midterm and TPP gave an exam today.  These events are deadly to the grandparents of students; two of them died.  And another fellow showed up appropriately winded to declare that he'd just gotten back from the police station.  "Released on your own recognizance?"  What?  "You made bail?"  Oh?  Oh!  Ha, ha, no; I was reporting a break in and theft.  And my homework was on my laptop that got stolen.  "But of course you have a backup."  Uh, no.  "Good thing you don't have a dog that could have eaten your stick memory."  Oh, no, another was delayed arriving back from home by a flight cancellation.  So many calamities, and just because of an exam.  And this is out of just 24 students.  It was the big lecture classes that gave me gray hair.